The author of the internationally syndicated column “Savage Love” brings much-needed humor, and a reality check, to the bitter gay-marriage debate with this polemical memoir. As Savage (Skipping Towards Gomorrah) and his boyfriend, Terry, neared their 10th anniversary, Savage’s mother put on the pressure for them to get married. But, Savage notes, there were several other points to consider before deciding to tie the knot: among them, the fact that marriage doesn’t provide legal protection in Washington State; Terry prefers tattoos as a sign of commitment; and their six-year-old son declared that only men and women can get married. Furthermore, Savage himself worried that the relationship would be jinxed by anything more permanent than a big anniversary bash, though the one they plan quickly assumes the proportions and price of a wedding reception. While documenting the couple’s wobble toward a decision, Savage skewers ideologues, both pro– and anti–gay marriage, with his radical pragmatism. Disproving Tolstoy’s dictum that “happy families are all alike,” he takes a sharp-eyed, compassionate look at matrimony as it is actually practiced by friends, his raucously affectionate family and even medieval Christians. When he explains to his son what marriage is really about, you want to stand up and cheer, and the surprise ending is both hilarious and a tear-jerker. As funny as David Sedaris’s essay collections, but bawdier and more thought-provoking, this timely book shows that being pro-family doesn’t have to mean being anti-gay.

Best known for his syndicated sexual advice column, “Savage Love,” Dan Savage shares his own story in The Kid, a hilarious account of his efforts–along with his partner–to adopt a child. (Whoops, make that his boyfriend; Savage can’t stand the “genderless” P-word: “Straight people and press organs that want to acknowledge gay relationships while at the same time pushing the two-penises stuff as far out of their minds as possible love ‘partner.’ I hated it.”) Savage doesn’t give an inch on the sexuality issue; it’s hard to imagine that a homophobic reader would even pick up The Kid, but if it happened, Savage’s unapologetic presentation of his life would quickly scare that reader off. Which isn’t to say that he paints a rosy picture of homosexual cohabitation: the very first scene finds Dan’s boyfriend, Terry, locking himself in the bathroom after a fight over the music on the car stereo. The misadventures continue through each step of the open-adoption process, in which Dan and Terry get to know their baby’s birth mother, and the first few weeks of parenthood. The Kid is a wonderful, charming account of real “family values” that proves love knows no limits

Someone once said that a literary classic is a book that captures the essence of its own time, place, and culture while simultaneously transcending those limits to achieve universality. By that definition is already a classic. It is an absorbing inspirational journey into one man’s obsession to create a family. Not just a gay book this is a profoundly human testimony to the strength of the human spirit. Overcoming all odds, Dr. Morgen and his life partner, Sam, show us how love caring and unshakable determination can triumph over prejudice and disappointment.